The Freakin' Weekend (1971)

Here goes up another monument that I'm probably going to regret.

You've probably been wondering what was on TV the last few nights of 1971. I'll get back to that in earnest; for now, I'll just say here's one of the things that was on Friday night, Sept. 17, about "the sport with the flash, dash and thrills custom-made for the new America ... the now America ..."

The new NFL season opened Sunday, Sept. 19, 1971, and the Baltimore Colts are the defending champs. Here are how the NFL70 division races played out ...

AFC East

Baltimore Colts (11-2-1, NFL champs)
Miami Dolphins (10-4, lost in first round of AFC playoffs)
New York Jets (4-10)
Buffalo Bills (3-10-1)
New England Patriots (2-12)

AFC Central

Cincinnati Bengals (8-6, lost in first round of AFC playoffs)
Cleveland Browns (7-7)
Pittsburgh Steelers (5-9)
Houston Oilers (3-10-1)

AFC West

Oakland Raiders (8-4-2, lost in AFC championship)
Kansas City Chiefs (7-5-2)
San Diego Chargers (6-6-3)
Denver Broncos (5-8-1)

NFC East

Dallas Cowboys (10-4, lost in the Super Bowl)
New York Giants (9-5)
St. Louis Cardinals (8-5-1)
Washington Redskins (6-8)
Philadelphia Eagles (3-10-1)

NFC Central

Minnesota Vikings (12-2, lost in the first round of the NFC playoffs)
Detroit Lions (10-4, lost in the first round of the NFC playoffs)
Chicago Bears (6-8)
Green Bay Packers (6-8)

NFC West

San Francisco 49ers (10-3-1, lost in the NFC championship)
Los Angeles Rams (9-4-1)
Atlanta Falcons (4-8-2)
New Orleans Saints (2-11-1)

I'm for the Zangers and the Dolphins ...

God, help me; I love it so ...

The Freakin' Weekend (1971)

Football is fun ...

Baseball is fun ...

Golf is fun ...

Even when you're not very good at it, golf is fun ...

Smoking is fun ...

Drinking is fun ...

All kinds of things--even curiosity, niche-y things like fancy music, home electronics and tinkering on old cars--are fun ...

Why, even work has its moments of fun ...

I'm so thankful that--presumably thanks in part to HP Nation's activism--Sports Illustrated restored its Vault. Flipping through these astoundingly great old magazines is just so, so, so much fun. And while having access to just the pictures or just the stories would be a wonderful gift in its own right, browsing through the page layouts is simply (and, I hope, literally) heavenly. With keyword-searchable access to text or images only, I would've never discovered, for example, this ...

This was no small undertaking. It's more than 7,000 words ...

Two teammates step out of the shower, glistening wet, towels wrapped around their waists. They move to center and stand slightly behind the big man, one to each side. Player on right reaches over and slaps the big man on the back)
FIRST PLAYER—Atta boy, Boog!
SECOND PLAYER—Ycu done it again, Boog! (He turns to the men in the showers) Didn't he do it again, you guys?
SHOWER CHORUS—Great, Boog! Yeah! Way to go!

What happens is that human Boog Powell is knocked out and replaced by a robot Boog Powell by a mad technologist and some rogue teammates ...

SCIENTIST—EXACTLY! I'LL CREATE A NEW RACE OF MY OWN/AND RULE THE WIDE WORLD ALONE./I CAN COPY THE MUSCLES/AND BUILD SIXTY BILL RUSSELLS/OR A NAMATH OR, IF YOU'RE NOT CHOOSY,/A BIGGER BOB COUSY!

The plot is pretty involved, and I'm not going to totally spoil the whole thing. But you could probably guess that Robot Boog has an epiphany ...

BOOG—But, wait! I wonder if...well, I wonder if I couldn't rebel. What the hell! I know it's fantastic for a man made of plastic. But a robot can take only so much. What made America great? Science? None such. What made America fine and clean and pure and strong? Electronics? Wrong! What made America great, all you people out there? It was...
(Drums. Switch to "Battle Hymn of the Republic")
BOOG—...baseball! That sharp, clean crack of the bat against horsehide! The throaty roar of that crowd. Out loud! The sandlot! The homer! Striking them out! Belting them in! Sliding home! Running for first! The double, the triple—Tinkers to Evers to Frankens...uh, Chance! Baseball! Your game, out there! You hear? Why, it's Dad and Son and it's the Seventh Inning Stretch; it's beer in a waxed-paper cup. The slanting sunshine across the bleachers, etching stark patterns in the infield. The pitcher tugging at the bill of his cap, waiting for the signal. The crowd tensing as he winds up! He delivers! It's a morality play! Why, it's life! It's love! It's America...

And then Human Boog comes on to save the day ...

SPORTSWRITER—And then the other two homers right after that went even farther. One landed in the upstairs bathroom of a house in Pittsburgh! And another one went all the way to....
BRAMPSON—(Slyly nudging the sportswriter in the ribs) I'll say! And the lady of the house was taking a bath at the time! Sploosh! Boy, talk about outfield!
SPORTSWRITER—His last three home-run balls have never been found, right? They could be in orbit!
COSELL—(Sidling up with a microphone) And tell our ABC audience out there, Mister Brampson. It is the opinion of this reporter that....
BRAMPSON—(Jerking his thumb in a familiar gesture) Somebody throw this bum oudda here.

It really goes to show you just how big a deal Boog Powell was in 1971. I imagine the writers imagined they had a sort of Babe Ruth on their hands. Not that they imagined he was ever going to be that good, but Boog Powell was more than good enough to merit attention ...

The main thing, though, was that Boog Powell was fun ...

But's that all old news. All of that was from the July 19, 1971, Sports Illustrated, and this #freakinweekend, we're up to the Aug. 2, 1971, Sports Illustrated ...

I can't begin to explain just how much fun I'm having with this MLB71 season, even if--another spoiler alert--the divisions are settled as of Sunday, July 30. As previously reported, I'm betting it's Boog and the Orioles repeating as World Series champions against the Giants. My pennant doubts about the A's were confirmed by a visit to Baltimore this week. In sweeping a rain-shortened, three-game series, the Os seemed to be toying with my A's--playing a bunch of backups, taking giant early leads, twice winning in the bottom of the ninth, etc.

Meanwhile, look what's on TV tonight 1971 ...

This game has been a huge deal, of course, in the sports pages of the Chicago Tribune for the last couple of months ...

Well, it's all very exciting--it's getting to be that time of year again ...

I better start reviewing what happened last season and get myself ready for the fun ahead this fall.

The Freakin' Weekend (1971)

"Let's say you're a basketball player. Someone throws you the ball. What are you going to do with it?"

Ol' Uncle Adolph is starting to feel pretty chipper ...

No. 9!

We're all about the lists this weekend 1971 at #freakinweekend ...

I love it Google Books has a bunch of browsable magazines, such as Jet ...

Meanwhile, Sports Illustrated isn't going to let us forget football ...

And the Middlesboro Daily News keeps us jazzed for TV ...

What's Going On?

Check out the new Marvin Gaye song on the radio today 1971 ...

Hoptown 1971 me wonders if there might be a new whole album on the way.

The Freakin' Weekend (1971)

I love the freakin' weekend.

Of course, the big deal this Jan. 15-17, 1971, weekend is Super Bowl V ...

Sports Illustrated concentrated its preview on "two dissimilar players, Craig Morton, Dallas' cool, quiet quarterback, and Mike Curtis, Baltimore's violent, voluble linebacker." It also included one of these advertising sections that I used to love ...

The Chicago Tribune has spent the week searching out local angles on the big game, such as catching up with former Bears tight end Mike Ditka ...

It also ran this great piece of original art ...

Meanwhile, back home in Hopkinsville, the Kentucky New Era wonders if we may be going overboard with the televised-football craze ...

Not me, though. I'm totally and unapologetically psyched ...

Those two pictures depict the Baltimore offense and Dallas defense (against the backdrop of a Coleco  Command Control electric-football field), and here are the Dallas offense and Baltimore defense ...

And the subs ...

 I'm ready for four beautiful hours of TV, football and commerce ...